Habit Swap - Revisited

I mentioned our loopchange Habit Swap plan a few days ago and I included the Fox26 Morning Show interview.  I have another video that goes over the principles of that SWAP plan and I'm including it below just in case any of you prefer 'listening' over 'reading'.

Change! Stop Being Afraid!

To take the red pill, or the blue pill. That was the question facing Neo in the mega-hit movie The Matrix. One pill led down the rabbit hole, where all of his questions would be answered and the life he knew would be gone forever. The other pill led back to his own bed and his old life and he would be left wondering if this had all been a dream. Because he's the hero in our movie, he chose the new life. He chose to leave his old life behind and face the unknowns of a world he'd never experienced before.

How many of us would have had the courage to make such a choice? Not many, I'm afraid. For most people, change is terrifying, sometimes even infuriating. Try changing the location of the coffee machine at your office or if you're feeling particularly brave, try changing the flavor of the coffee. Do both and you're likely to need a police escort to your car! Such a meaningless thing, but it would generate such a large reaction.

People hate change. Is it because they like their lives so much? I don't believe so. I read that Oprah recently had a poll on her website where the question was simply, "Are you happy with yourself". A whopping 75% of those polled responded 'no'. Only 1 in 4 of us consider ourselves to be happy. Isn't that shocking? Isn't it sad?
 
So should we conclude that people are generally unhappy and that they generally want to stay that way? That doesn't make any sense either. Walk up to any random person on the street and ask them list off the things that are going badly in their life right now and they are almost certain to rattle off a quick list of five or ten things.

So it's not that we're already happy...and it's not that want to be unhappy. There must be something else to this.

I recently read about a scientific study that had been done on mice. Researchers had set up a pedal that the mice would push to get a food pellet. Once the mice had mastered this, the researchers played a cruel, cruel trick on them. They wired the pedal so that it gave the mice a large shock of electricity at the same time it dispensed the food pellet. It shocked the mice every time they went for a food pellet. Reading the results of that study, it appears that the most a mouse ever went back to that pedal was five times. Never did a mouse go for a 6th time. The mice literally starved to death rather than go back and be shocked again (sounds like a horrible experiment doesn't it?).

I think that as children grow to become adults, with regard to change, we are very much like those mice. I think we've learned that trying to change and failing is very painful. I think we've learned that trying to change all on your own is incredibly difficult. I think we've learned that if we announce to the world that we're trying to change, there will be a long line of people looking to tell us why we won't be able to do it and why we're almost certainly going to fail. I think we've learned that because of their own insecurities, people love to point and laugh when they see someone fall short of their goals.

The world is a cruel place and changing requires courage and thick skin. Those are two qualities that many of us just don't feel like we've got. Not today anyway. Maybe tomorrow. No, not tomorrow, but Monday for sure. Or maybe after the holidays or after New Years.

I think at the most basic level, people don't change because of OTHER people. That is a horribly sad reason to continue on a course that has led to unhappiness. Isn't it time to to start making the best decisions for yourself rather than choosing the path with the least amount of risk or the least amount of difficulty?

You CAN change the way you want to change. You CAN be the person that you want to be. Isn't it time you stood up and embraced your true identity? It all starts with a single choice, a single decision. Make that decision today.

5 Tips for Breaking Habits

Last year, when we began researching the concept for loopchange, we did an awful lot of research about the process of changing habits, the methods people had found to be successful and we stumbled across an awful lot of sketchy information.  Also in that time, I was constantly attempting to perform my own case study using myself and some friends who agreed to be voluntary lab rats for the "cause."

Through my own successes and failures, here is what I've found so far:

1 - Committing to a change of some kind is HARD.  Your first battle will be fought before you've even begun.  You can safely expect a barrage of reasons that you can't do it, that the timing is wrong, that next week would be better.  You've got to tell that voice to shut up!  I believe that subconsciously that is our 'fear of failure' rearing its ugly head.  Failing hurts.  Failing publicly can be humiliating.  Our deepest being knows that, and wants to keep us away from such 'risks'

 2 - Write down your goals.  Be specific and include details.  Vaguely defining your goal leads down the path of failure.  How, exactly, are you going to change your diet?  How much TV will you allow yourself to watch?  The more details that are provided, the more likely the person is to succeed.

3 - Accountability.  At loopchange we help to connect you with people who will be holding you accountable.  Don't get me wrong though, our community is made up of people who honestly CARE about your progress.  They aren't checking in on you, waiting to pick, poke, prod and point fingers.  They are checking in on you so that you know your mission is important to them (because it is).  Finding some real world accountability helps a great deal as well.  Tell a friend or a family member what you're doing.  Ask them to help if it looks like you're struggling.


4 - Encourage other people who are trying to change something about themselves.  I cannot stress the value of this step enough.  The word 'encourage' originally, literally meant 'to put heart into'.  To build someone up.  There is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when we encourage other people - we feel encouraged and stronger ourselves.  It's fascinating, but true.

5 - How long will it take to change?  The only scientific research I've found on the topic says 19+ days (where the + can be 200 or more days).  There is no set answer, but it will take exactly as long as it will take.

Using my own experience, I've come to believe that the commitment, faithfulness, dedication and will to change is very much like a muscle.  As you get a few successes under your belt and build up your confidence a bit, you'll find that you become significantly stronger in those areas.  When you've faced and completed a mission to change something, it will be much easier to tackle something else.  Before you know it, what started as a scary, anxiety filled experience will become something that you are excited about - and you will find that you'll gain so much momentum that you will be changing left and right.

But it all begins with that single step.  You have to find a way to ignore that voice in your head telling you it's not worth it - because IT IS!

Back Up, Back Up, Back Up

Guess I should back up and mention what the site is all about before continuing (why didn't I think of THAT for the first post??).

What is loopchange?

***********
The world specializes in tearing people down; in discouraging change; in telling you what you can't be and what you can't do. We are tired of accepting that lie. We think it’s time to start taking back our lives and working to become the person that we really want to be deep inside.

Loopchange was built around the concept that by clearly stating our goals in a public way (even if it is technically anonymous) and by giving daily updates on our progress, failures, fears, struggles and successes; a person really can change their patterns and habits. Deep down, many of us are frustrated by the things we do. Many of us wish we could be different – even in small ways – and we’re here to tell you that you CAN be.

Look at how much time you spend at your job; doing laundry; working around the house; watching television and any of the other dozens of daily activities that combine to make up your life. Isn’t it time we carved out just a few minutes a day to begin improving ourselves? Loopchange can help you do that. Spend a few minutes a day here starting a mission; updating your daily progress – and hopefully encouraging others who are going through the very same struggles you are – and we believe you can change your life….one small step at a time.

You can make changes. You can become the person that you want to be. I know it. Deep down you know it. Now, let's get started.
***********

So there you have it.  That is what we're about.

Feel free to pop over for a visit:  www.loopchange.com

Changing a Habit: Quitting Television

We're going to occasionally ask loopchange users who've completed a mission if they'd be willing to come and 'guest blog' about their experience.  So, without further ado, here is Habanero - one of our users who recently completed a mission to give up television for 21 days.

Hello.  My name is Habanero and I'm a TV junkie.  (Hi Habanero!)  It's been 21 days since I watched my last television show and I feel great! 

It's sad to say, but for the last several years my life has very literally revolved around the television.  What's even worse is that many of the shows I watched, I didn't really even like!  When I was sitting at my desk (at work) letting my mind drift toward post-work events, my first stop was always "what's on tonight?"  I could pretty much recite the line up of programs I watched every day of the week.  It almost seems crazy now looking back at it and it hasn't even been that long!

This site gives some statistics of American television use that is amazing.  They say that the average American watched 4 hours of TV per day.  This equates to 2 months of non-stop television watching PER YEAR!  In a 65 year life, they say that person will have watched television for 9 solid years! 

After I'd stumbled upon the loopchange website, I'd been trying to think of a mission I could try.  My reliance on television quickly came to mind.  At the same time though, I was honestly scared of trying it!  I am married and have two young children.  How would I fill all of that time that the TV had been filling for me?  Would my Wife and I have anything to talk about??  Would I be bored out of my mind?? 

It was an adjustment at first.  At times, I didn't know what to do with myself.  I had moments where I literally sat and did nothing.  But those feelings quickly passed.  I read a lot of books.  My Wife and I had some great conversations.  I got a LOT more sleep!  In retrospect, the overwhelming feeling that I had was freedom.  I was free of the feeling that I was committed to watch a number of television shows each night that I honestly didn't care about anyway!

It felt wonderful.  It continues to feel wonderful!  It has been a little over 40 days since I began my mission.  Between the end of the official mission (21 days in) and now; I have watched a little television.  I actually even began watching an old TV series that I'd been wanting to see (The Wire).  But my life has definitely been changed.  My 4-5 hour a night habit is currently something like 2-3 hours per week.  I like my life a LOT better now. 

So, if you're reading this and you've considered trying to cut down on the amount of time you spend in front of the television; my advice is DO IT!  Right away.  Don't wait.  You won't regret it.

If you're interesting in reading Habanero's full journey - you can read it here: quitting television.

How have you changed lately?

Can you name one way that you've changed in the last month?  The last year?  I don't think "I get my gas at Exxon instead of Valero now" qualifies.  I don't think "I bought fat free yogurt last time I was at the store" qualifies.  I don't think "I switched my cell phone provider from Verizon to Sprint" qualifies.

This is your LIFE we're talking about!  You only get one shot at it.  Stop settling for an existence that allows days on end to pass without you really even making a ripple in your existence; without you committing to get the most out of this life that you possibly can.

Take 2 minutes.  Make a list of 10 things you'd like to change about yourself - make sure they are 10 things that you actually have some amount of control over.  Some examples might be:

- Cut down the amount of time you watch television each day
- Keep a journal for your spouse and kids
- Modify your diet
- Make time for exercise
- Re-adjust your priorities to make sure you get the sleep you need to be all you can be for your family
- Get a habit like email of facebook under control
- Make time to do something you've always wanted to do

There are endless possibilities.  Pick something, ONE thing and go with it.  You'll be amazed at the amount of momentum you can build as you get through the first thing on your list.

Here is your action plan:
- Make your list
- Pick one thing (make it one that seems easier)
- Tell a friend about your plan
- Go to http://www.loopchange.com
- Make an account
- Start a mission
- Come back once per day to update your progress
- Browse the other mission and encourage others in their missions (you'll be amazed at how much strength this step will give you)
- Rinse and Repeat once you've got the first change handled

Now, that voice in your head telling you "I can't", "maybe later", "it's not a good time", "I'm not strong enough to do that kind of thing" - that voice is going to ALWAYS be there.  It will not leave your head until you force it out, so stop listening to it.  You CAN.  Now is perfect.  Today is a GREAT time.  You ARE strong enough and deep down you know it.